Remember we’re talking here about the proper understanding of emotion. We’re trying to understand an emotion, that’s our primary goal. So let’s try to get back to the topic because it’s really important that we have the proper understanding of emotion.
Emotions pass through us and do not stay with us
Now what have we basically said is that the proper understanding of emotion is that emotions pass. So they are not important to hold on to, they’re important to feel and let them pass. There’s a big difference. When you feel they’re important to hold onto, now you’re investing them, and now you’ll do anything to protect them, and that’s not good. It’s not a good thing for you. You’re going to do a lot of very unloving things doing that. When you let them pass, they pass. You don’t have to act upon them even, if they’re negative. You don’t even have to act on them because you just feeling them. When I say act upon them, I mean if you feel anger, you’ll get out and punch something, but you won’t punch a person, or you won’t kill a live thing, or anything like that if you’re fully in harmony with love, while you’re feeling the emotion of anger. So you’d fully express the emotion, but you wouldn’t take further damaging actions about the emotion if it’s unloving. And that’s all about fully feeling the emotion; letting it pass through you. Let yourself feel it, really let yourself feel it. Don’t hold back with the feeling of it.
Denying the emotion in the moment
Sometimes we have discussions with people. They come around and we have a long discussion about what one of their sadnesses or one of their griefs are about and we get to the point where they’re just about to cry, and what do they do? Get that back down again and get it under control. Now that entire two hour conversation was just a waste of time. It might have been two, three, four, five or six people involved in it, it’s all just a waste of time now because the actual emotion that was uncovered during the discussion never got felt.
If you chose to feel it in the moment you would have just run off, have a big bawl, and just have a feeling of grief for maybe an hour or couple of hours. Sure everyone else might have gone home during that time, but the conversation would have had an end result, a purpose, and that is to help a person get to an emotion and let it pass through them. Much better choice, isn’t it?
I do understand when you just said that it was a waste of time, because it was ripe in that moment, but because of that, the body actually knew what was coming up, does it also create an opportunity for that emotion to be felt, or those circumstances then have to …
No, actually the person had to put up a stronger barrier in order to not feel the emotion, so it actually made the situation worse for the person. This is what you don’t realise. Every time you’re shutting down an emotion in a situation, you’re making it harder to access the next time it comes around.
So when we don’t want to cry in public, especially in the settings when we’re with you guys, to get through that cap would be really beneficial, especially if we’re doing assistance groups and we’re going to be around that so much.
Definitely, all you have to do is just walk out the door and have a good cry, come back in. You don’t want to interrupt other people from having the session, so you just leave and have a good cry and come back.
The reason why a lot of us don’t do that is because we think we’re going to miss out, which is another emotion. We think that somebody’s going to condemn us for it, judgment, another emotion.
“I’ll go I’ll do that later when I …”
“I’ll do that later,” which is a bit of a furphy ‒ usually that’s because we don’t want to do it now. So that’s another emotion. Really there’s a whole series of emotions that stop us from doing that generally, and we need to allow ourselves to feel those too, if we’re ever going to become a fully 100% emotional being.
Can you see how like we compound the problem by a level of resistance? If an emotion is getting exposed, let’s say behind a wall of fear ‒ do you remember the wall is fear? Behind the wall is the emotion you have to feel, the one that’s going to heal you, just straight behind the wall, and the wall is generally fear of something: be specific, it’s not just a generalised fear, it’s a fear, of this particular emotion behind the wall. In front of the wall are the addictions and you’re here.
We have addictions and a wall of fear between us and our healing emotions
What are you going to have to do? If a feeling is on feeling an emotion it’s about becoming 100% emotionally, what are you going to have to do? If you want to get to the healing emotion here, where I heal when I feel that, what am I going to have to do? Just help me through the process.
I’m going to have to go through these addictions …
I’m going to have to feel …
I’m going to have to feel them …
… the addictions.
… to their full extent.
… how much I want them.
What happens when I feel them?
They’re going to get bombed out of there.
And then I’m face to face with my wall. So I’m here now.
Then I’m going to have to feel through my fear.
Correct. What does feeling my fear do?
Eliminates my wall of fear.
All right, so now I’m there.
And then I reckon you’re probably not going to have much problem in actually feeling the actual emotion.
When we work through our addictions and our fear, then we can access our healing emotions
When I feel that emotion, my body heals, my love internally that I have ‒ that I can reflect ‒ grows, and then I’m in business. I’ve gone through that emotion. Now that I’ve healed, I’ve no longer got that emotion in me, and it’s no longer affecting the rest of my life. It’s no longer governing my decisions, it’s no longer determining my thoughts, it’s no longer determining how I interact with every person around me, all of that’s stopped. It’s all gone, when I take those steps.
Now what the majority of us want to do is this. Here’s our wall, that’s fear. Here’s our healing emotion that we need to feel. Here’s our addiction. The healing emotion is our grief usually, or shame, or whatever it is. And here’s us. What do we want to do? You tell me Phillippa what you want to do. What do you want to do with it?
Either not feel it at all or bypass it.
Correct. We want to skip to after the healing emotion. Somehow, I don’t know how you’re going to do it, to be honest, but somehow you want to get from before the additions, across to after the grief, by somehow digging a tunnel, and getting under the whole lot, by somehow avoiding all of that process, from an emotional perspective.
Many of us want to bypass feeling our emotions in order to get to place that is after the healing emotion (grief)
Do you know one way that most New Age people have experimented with to get from the beginning to the end?
It’s really, really easy way that most people have used. They tell themselves they’re already there. (Laughter) That’s what they do. And of course it’s not real. It’s completely unreal but they tell themselves they’re already there. They’re already over the addictions, they don’t have any fear, they don’t have any grief to feel anymore. It’s all gone, isn’t it wonderful. We’re in a wonderful world, it’s so lovely. The reality is everything they do is coloured by the emotions that are still within. So it’s all fake, it’s all not real.
That’s what the majority of people try to do. We tell ourselves we haven’t got it. We tell ourselves we don’t need to do it. We tell ourselves that we shouldn’t do it. We tell ourselves that if we do it something bad is going to happen. We’ll come up with a hundred different explanations if we have to.
Choosing to become 100% emotional
What I’m suggesting, if you want to be 100% emotional being, you won’t choose to do that. You won’t choose to avoid anything. You won’t choose to try to get to the end using some unknown method that hasn’t been created by anyone, including God. You will do the method that God created, which is feel the addiction, feel the fear, feel the grief. You will go through the emotional process; you will choose to, because you want to. That’s what you’ll do.
The majority of us don’t do that, really. What we do is we try to circumvent it. We work out how to do it, we discuss it with somebody else, “Do you know how to get around this addiction somehow? Do you know how to get over this fear somehow, without actually going through it? Do you know how to get rid of this grief? Is there some magical solution?” This is why we’re addicted to magical solutions. “Wow there’s a potion that gets me through all that! I’ll take the potion.” You know, “There’s a pill that I can take called antidepressants, I’ll take that.” Get over all that.
We do whatever we can do physically to avoid the process. We do whatever we can do emotionally to avoid the process. We do whatever we do sexually to avoid the process. We engage all of these ways and means of controlling the process, when all we’ve got to do is choose to be a 100% emotional being and go through the process.
Sometimes I look at what people do in their lives and I go, “Yeah, wow, if my life were that complicated, I don’t know what I would do.” I know I’d get rid of the complication, that’s what I’d be focused on first. But I just look at some people’s lives and go, “Wow how complicated can you make your life.” To turn something that’s so simple into something that’s so hard and complicated and difficult, and then you’re dealing with compensatory effects of all of that as well.
Every unloving choice that’s made in that space has to be dealt with, has to be felt and it’s just like making a mountain sometimes out of a molehill with regard to our emotions because we believe the molehill is a mountain before we begin; and it’s only a belief.
You see if we had the right proper understanding of emotion, we wouldn’t believe the mountain is a molehill, or the molehill is a mountain. We would say, “A mountain’s a mountain, and a molehill’s a molehill.” It’s just an emotion, every one of them that we can feel. Some of our emotions are large, but it’s just an emotion we can feel, and some of our emotions are very small, and we turn them into making them large. That’s not very honest, but it’s also just an emotion we can feel. That’s it.
Read Continuation here: